wishing for talent...

If I could become pretty good at something, I think I'd choose photography.  It's odd, but I love pictures and scrapbooking so I think it would be something useful for me.  I don't necessarily really want to learn, because the mumbo jumbo is too confusing, but I think the processing of the photos and making it look a certain way is so cool!

This is a work of free photo processing online. I was trying to play around with colors a bit- but it seems like the "cheap way out" and it could probably look a million times better. Either way, I wanted to remember this moment that I found out how to create this "vintage carnival" look!!

Finding Myself...

This has been such a process: the act of finding who I am, what I am passionate about.  I was looking for myself in a mold: maybe in a business- making cards, maybe in a different industry in fashion.  Everything seems too difficult to start from scratch.  Which makes me question if I was ever passionate about it in the first place.  I don't think Mozart decided that it was going to be too hard to be a musician and didn't even try.  He just loved music. He just lived music.  




What do I love??  Why can't I even answer such a simple question for myself??  I refuse to believe that I was meant for a passionless life!!  I am a passionate person, full of emotion and life.  Will that one day die out too?  Will I lose who I am?  Day by day as I become complacent and satisfied in the comfort of the known and the daily path traveled I could feel myself blending into the grays of life.  I know I was created for more.  Not in a conceited way do I make that statement, but I just know in the very fiber of who I am, God did not intend for my life to be just this.  He wants me to be alive, to be living everyday to the full! 
 I must not forget that...